Skip to main content

Hospitality for the Rest of Us: Kicking Folks Out



There will come a point during every party that you're ready for everyone to leave. If you're lucky, this moment will happen after folks have started to leave as opposed to before they arrive.

The punch has been drunk, cake eaten, stories told, it's time for them to go. First, since you're an introvert, take a moment and do something alone. For instance, go to the bathroom, take out the garbage, excuse yourself unexplained and close yourself in your bedroom. Just go be by yourself for a second and take an inventory of who's left and which folks you haven't talked to yet. Take another moment and just breath. As we used to say "smoke 'em if ya got 'em." If you dot know what that means, then good for you, ask your crazy aunt about it some time, she'll explain it. 

Now that you've had a moment and a list of folks you haven't spoken with, join the party again, find one of those folks and say hello. This little retreat and attack tactic may help you make it through another hour of people invading your home. Repeat as necessary.

Alright, so you've met your limit. Here are some phrases to start using 

Oh my, is it really that late?

We really should do this again sometime.

Do you have any other plans for today?

It's been so wonderful seeing you. 

You should call me next week so we can talk about this more.

I really should start working on these dishes. (This may get you some help in the kitchen or cause the fastest exit strategy)


Now, if it's a good friend, just be honest. Tell them you're tired and need to get some rest. You'll see them again soon.

Those all work for large gatherings with stragglers. But what about those individual get togethers or small groups? 

You might be stuck. But honesty can work here, too. Let them know you enjoyed your time together. Get up. Help them gather their things. Walk toward the door. And wave good-bye as they walk away.  Added bonus, if you enjoyed getting together, make another date! 

This is one of the drawbacks of having people in your home. You can't just leave, they do.

We talked about extended house guests. Oh man, hopefully, they let you know before hand when they would leave. Once they're in, they're in. You can kick them out, but you need to sit down and have a frank conversation. 

I'm no expert on any of these. But I do want to share a story to keep us mindful of our words. We had a student from Africa, Joseph, who was often asked when he was returning to his home. People were curious and concerned about his family. He, however, thought that it meant people did not want him around. He was relieved to find out otherwise, but it does show that our questions should be honest and on point in regards to hospitality. Occasionally, we do want to tell people to go away. Let's make sure that they know it's our limitation and not their company. 

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Stories from the Kitchen: Taste and See

I celebrated my birthday last weekend. It was wonderful and the leftovers left me with a question or two. Find out what they are and how I'm currently answering them in this week's podcast.

Stories from the Kitchen Season 2, Episode 2: Taste and See






Notes from the episode:

Taste and See by Margaret Feinberg

Dad’s New York Cheesecake (from the back of a Philidelphia Cream Cheese package)
1 ⅞ cups graham cracker crumbs ¼ to ½ cup butter, melted 1 cup sugar, divided 2 lbs cream cheese (4 packs) 2 large eggs (lightly beaten) 1 tsp vanilla 2 tbsp cornstarch 1 cup sour cream
Preheat oven to 450F
Mix well graham crackers, 2 tbsp sugar, and enough butter that the mixture holds together. Reserve 2 tbsp for garnish. Press mixture onto bottom and sides of a greased 9-inch springform pan. Chill in the freezer while preparing the filling.
Mix cream cheese and sugar until smooth and light. Beat in eggs, vanilla, and cornstarch until just blended. Stir in sour cream. Pour mixture into crust and bake for…

James Week 10 James 5: 13-20

We finish up our study on James with some encouraging words about prayer and standing in the gap.




Study Questions Week 10


When you don't feel like yourself, what is generally your first response? Do you start with prayer, rest, food, lashing out at others? When you encounter others that are not acting like themselves what is your initial thought? How do you think your relationships would be different if you began those interactions with prayers? Prayers for understanding for yourself and peace for the other person?When you are happy, do you ever try to keep it to yourself because you don't want to celebrate while others around you are struggling? Can focusing our happiness towards God with praise and worship change how we view sharing those moments? God is the source of every good and perfect gift (James 1:17). How can this verse help shape your worship and praise? Take some time this week to praise God for some good gifts, which are present even if you are in the midst of a s…

Thankful Thursday

Hard to believe that it's Thursday already, but it is! Wow! I'm thankful for a whole bunch of things this week, so many that if I would list them all, I'd be here for the rest of the day and into tomorrow. Heck I'd be lucky to be done by the end of the decade.

I'm thankful for my husband! He's a real trooper. Love how he not only cares for so many people through the church, but that he cares for our family. Seems like he's always got just a little bit more time to do what needs to be done, which is pretty amazing considering that he's only got the same 24 hours that I have.

I'm thankful for my little girl. I enjoyed the time away when she was at camp last week, but we've been having fun this week hanging out together. She's pretty amazing in lots of hard to explain ways, I guess she's mysterious in her lovliness. I hope that others are as impressed with it as I am.

I'm thankful for family near and far. I'm looking forward to spe…